No Heavy Petting in Dis Bish!!!
Posted by: Ily Taboada on: December 27, 2009
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So my girls and I have this saying about sex, we call it “Heavy Petting”. Reason being, two of my friends have very young children and they are occasionally nearby when we engage in grown folk talk. So, to keep their eyes as innocent as possible we just use the phrase Heavy Petting in lieu of the word sex. Now for the last year and a half I have been out of the heavy petting game, and because of this I had become the No Heavy Petting spokesperson. However, within the last couple of months I had started to feel a little differently about that. With so much sex going on around me and the opportunity of new sex approaching I became so consumed with the idea of returning to the heavy petting game. Consumed soo much that I even indulged in “sexting” with an ex who’s in a relationship with another woman, which is totally wrong. Then out-of-the-blue the last guy I had sex with called me and it went downhill from there.
Now let me just say that this gentleman isn’t a bad person; he’s just really clueless about women. Needless to say it never ends well with him, typical male/female communication issues. Well, over the Christmas holiday I did something that I know good-and-damn well I shouldn’t have done. He and I heavy petted.
Fast-forward two days later, I’m feeling some kind of way. I do have other men showing me some form of attention, but since it’s not from him, it’s not really doing me any good. So now I’m frustrated with him because he’s not giving me the attention I want, which is stupid because he wasn’t giving it to me before, so what the hell?
So, I called him which was probably a bad move, who knows; the conversation of course didn’t go the way I wanted it too, but it more than likely went the way I needed to hear it go. What happened the other night didn’t change him, why would it? It changed me. I can’t be upset or hurt by him because I hurt myself. I allowed my physical need for heavy petting to convince me that, the HP was all I needed and wanted but truth be told it isn’t all I need and want. There was a moment just before the HP that I truly enjoyed and THAT was what I wanted. I’m not talking about the foreplay but the moment when you’re irresistible to him. It even comes after occasionally. I love being touched by a man, not in the sexually sense (don’t get me wrong, I really enjoy that part) but just being held by man is soo fulfilling to me. However, the price that I am now paying for that is too overwhelming. I had another gentleman here who wanted to “date” me but I know he wants sex, it’s not gonna happen. It truly pains me to say that I’m not free-spirited and I can’t just “go with the flow”; especially not when it involves something so serious, to me, as sex.
I know your probably asking, why the hell is she blogging about this?
I’m doing this for all of the women who feel like I feel and just need to know that they aren’t alone. There are plenty of women out there who can’t HP every man they meet and I (as much as it pains me, cause I REALLY like SEX) am one of those women. I get attached, I catch feelings, how do you not? I mean, I’ve physically allowed someone to enter my body… I don’t know how some women do it but I won’t do this to myself anymore.. it has to be a committed relationship. Then again, I doing it for all the other obvious reasons, I just needed to get this off my chest.
With that being said I’ve returned to my previous mantra of NO HEAVY PETTING IN DIS BISH!!!
Single in the City
Posted by: Ily Taboada on: December 15, 2009
So I’ve made the move to NYC and as I patiently wait for my life in NY to take flight, I’ve realized how incredibly lonely I feel. Now, before it’s even suggested let me say that I have friends, four of them; however, as great as they are there’s still a little something missing. A Man! I know a strong “independent women” like me, should feel secure enough in herself to be single and proud. Well I ain’t, I would like a man!
Someone strong, handsome, funny, sweet, and romantic; there’s more but I don’t need to go into too much detail. Now granted, I’m not truly at a place where I can meet a man halfway but I still want one. (I’m making it sound more like a toy than another human being.)
I’m at the age where I feel like my “clock” is definitely starting to tick, but in all honesty I’m not really at a place to get married or have children. I’d love to settle down and wait for that great guy who’s going to become my husband but, again, I just don’t think I’m REALLY ready. Professionally, I’ve just restarted my career and personally, I’m still in the process of doing some spring cleaning in my heart, mind and soul. After reading The Conversations by Hill Harper, it’s made me realize just how un-ready for a serious relationship I am. It didn’t help that I had a conversation with a young man that furthered my belief, in my not being ready. I can’t even form a friendship with someone of the opposite sex; I’m almost teen-like. I blush when he’s around, and I think I form an attachment waaay too early for words. I get a little sad when he’s not available, I get excited about him when I know I’m gonna be around him….
What the hell is my problem!?
I don’t even really know if I like this guy, but I’m showing all the signs of someone who is severely open off of him. I think he likes me too but… he’s not being as proactive as I’d like him to be. I mean, I want to be pursued for once. This is the part I don’t like!? I wish I knew how to go slower to “be light” just enjoy the flirting for what it is, just aimless flirting; I mean if it turns into more in the future, great! In the meantime, it’s stupid to get over indulgent in a man, who may or may not have interest in me. The downsized to all of this…. I am soooo sexually frustrated its not funny. I miss sex! I don’t want to but I do, badly. This is another reason, why I need to step back. The last thing I need to do is to start up a sexual relationship with someone. I don’t know that I can do a serious relationship but I know I don’t want a sex-friend.
The only thing I can do is be patient but I’m not a very patient person… I’ll fill you in if something happens.
Mad Cabbers
Posted by: Ily Taboada on: February 25, 2009
Cab Drivers in Baltimore are mad as hell and are not gonna take it.
So I have the “pleasure” of working on Baltimore street where yellow cab drivers have decided to iniate their protest of decreasing fares. As we speak(or read) yellow cabs are circle Baltimore street preventing buses from picking up passengers and up until recently disturbing the flow of business.
Personally speaking, I haven’t riden in a cab since 06′ and I don’t plan on it, and you can thank Jimmy’s for that. From 01′-06′, I was an unfortunate member of Jimmy’s cab “fan club”. They have to be the worse cab service in the WORLD, not the county Craig, the WORLD. Jimmy’s had this system where they couldn’t pick up fares unless you called into the service, which I totally understand, it’s for their own safety; but after a while they (the cab drivers) started to misuse the system. They would confirm new fares in the middle of current fairs; meaning if you called into the service, and they were in the middle of taking someone somewhere they would take your call but not be available until they drop that person off. So you, like an idiot is stuck waiting for them to show up. I can’t tell you how many times I was late for work, school, you name it.
I hope they do decrease the fares. It’ll only work in favor of the consumer.
screaming: DOWN WITH JIMMY!!!! DOWN THE FARES!!!
SIDENOTE: Does downing the fares matter soo much that you’ll miss a days work, matter in the long haul? when you budget out the week, you’ll probably come out the same with the fare decreases.
Chris Brown… problem child????
Posted by: Ily Taboada on: February 25, 2009
Chris and Rihanna (private moment captured)
So now everyone and their momma wants to dog Chris Brown. I’m not gonna do it, the boy (yes, I said boy) is young and (now don’t tell anyone I said this) HUMAN!!! He made an OBVIOUS MISTAKE. Why is everyone acting like he killed her? Yeah, unfortunately, I saw the picture. Now granted, if it was my sister that he “beat” like that, I’d be ready to fight; but when it’s all said and done, I would have to move on for my sister’s sake.
Everybody is so gun-ho about stating their opinions and who their supporting that they forget sometimes the best support is the silent kind. The last thing that Chris or Rihanna need is people constantly talking about what happened? And what went wrong? (Like anyone other then them and God, really knows).
Leave them alone!!!
BTW, am I the only one that’s seriously disappointed in MTV for their “news special” on the subject? I mean really, the whole show was contrived of “expert” opinions and “sources”. ARE YOU SERIOUS MTV? I’ve lost so much respect for that network, it’s ridiculous. Don’t get me wrong I do feel that it’s important for women (and men) to understand their worth and to realize that it is not o.k. for ANYONE (male or female) to abuse you, pointblank!! But forgive me if I don’t think that, that was the real reason behind them airing that “special”. The issue there was ratings plain and simple!! If the show was about abuse in relationships, it would have had more information on everyday couples facing the issue and their “experts” would have spoke more on the issue itself and less on Chrihanna.
This whole situation has left a bad taste in my mouth, not for Chris Brown but for the media, and their way of handling this. Look at TMZ, they sold out Rihanna’s privacy for $62K. Really!? That cheap!?
And I hope that the person at the LAPD who is responsible for the leak, never finds out just how much of a B*&^h Karma can be. Yeah, you got $62k but what are you gonna lose for that money, other than respect?
Oh! And stop asking celebrities their opinion on this private matter. That’s like someone asking your neighbor, their opinion, on how you cooked your pot roast. Who gives a rat’s behind? They don’t have to eat it, so it really doesn’t matter how they feel. Same can be said for the celebrities, they aren’t in the relationship so gives a rat’s behind on how they feel about it. Keep It Moving!!
And to the bloggers who posted the photo, regardless of the statement you made before or after you posted it, SHAME ON YOU. It doesn’t matter what statement you made when you posted it, the fact that you posted it, makes you no different from TMZ.
To Rihanna and Chris, may God guide you in this situation to make the best decision for YOU!! Buck the world and DO YOU!!!
xoxo Ily
DK – Damaged or publicity Stunt!!
Posted by: Ily Taboada on: February 25, 2009
DK and Diddy in better times
So last night I’m watching MTB 4 and of course they’re talking about the Danity Kane Incident.
Puffy (I don’t care about the name change he’ll always be Puffy to me) starts acting all confused like the “break-up” came out of no where. I’m thinking Negro, you broke up the group when you kicked out Aubrey and D.Woods (let’s not B.S you did fire her). The other weird part was Aundrea and Dawn; am I the only one who didn’t know they had an issue with Aubrey?
Least to say, I’m very interested in how this’ll all play out.
Even though I already know that DK will “reunite” before the end of the season.
Fashion week!!! (It’s the most wonderful time of the year)
Posted by: Ily Taboada on: February 25, 2009
That’s right, Fashion Week!!!
I love NY’s Fashion Week, (no I’ve never been) but what I love the most is what it means in the fashion world. It means that a new season of clothing is coming our way. Fashion “Week” usually last for a month or two, because there’s pretty much a fashion week everywhere. Some states have their own fashion week on a smaller scale, but none compare to the big wigs. Milan, Paris, LA, and the grandiose New York. It’s one of my life long goals to attend at least one in my life, and I promise you I will.
If your interested in keep up with fashion week and the different shows, hit up my home girls at http://fashionista101.com/ or http://www.style.com/ both sites give very in-depth look into what each designer has to offer for that particular season.
Where you been?
Posted by: Ily Taboada on: February 19, 2009
- In: Rant
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No where to be quite honest with you. Not due to economic reasons, just because I’ve lost interest in B-more’s club scene. I’m gonna evolve and write about other things in the future. I may just vent about the different things that piss me off or I’ll just post the occasional item of interest (gossip, movies, fashion, etc).
How many sequels are too many sequels
Posted by: Ily Taboada on: July 26, 2008
On Thursday, Twisted pictures/Lionsgate films released the trailer for “Saw V”
Don’t get me wrong, Saw VI was just as good if not better (in its own way) than the first Saw film, but how many follow ups to the first one can they release before people just get plain sick of it.
Unlike the Halloween series, Saw seems to get fresher each year.
Here’s the synopsis for the film, via Yahoo! Movies:
With everyone else dead and rotting, it’s up to Hoffman to continue Jigsaw’s murderous traditions. When he feels that his identity might be discovered, the killer has to use all his training as a detective to track down anything–and anyone–that might expose him.
What do you think? Will you go see it.
RIP – K Swift
Posted by: Ily Taboada on: July 24, 2008
Although, I can honestly say that I wasn’t a fan of her music, it still pains me to see someone so close to my age pass. Hopefully, I didn’t sound too selfish with saying that.
K-Swift began DJ’ing at the age of 11. Seven years later, she found herself interning at 92Q Jams. A couple years later, just barely into her 20s, she began DJ’ing for a 92Q show called “Ladies Night.” She quickly became known as Baltimore’s best female DJ, if not its only one.
She overcame many obstacles, including opposition from some of Baltimore’s male DJs. Still, she successfully co-hosted a nightly show from 6 to 10 p.m. Her show became one of Baltimore’s most popular.
In the midst of all of her hard-fought and well-deserved success, she never lost her roots. While she mixed for some of the hottest clubs in the city, she still made time to mix for local high school parties.
Her MySpace page (click)is filled with comments from people all over the city. Some talk about seeing her recently at Artscape. Her page still shows her signed in to her account, as an “online now” status flashes underneath her name. Those who knew her express shock and sadness that the person they grew to love is gone.
WJZ is reporting that she drowned (click)and that her body was found [Monday] morning.
The Baltimore Sun reports (click)that an autopsy is pending.
Taken from Bthesite.com
Since this story was written, sources are now revealing that K-Swift died after jumping into a 5ft above ground pool, she was intoxicated at the time. With the release of that information, I hope that parents, friends, and colleagues would bare witness to the fact that Alcohol/Food and [bodies of] water don’t mix, at any time. People often accuse gangs and the youth, of taking life for granted, when the truth is; we all do. Please don’t take this as me speaking ill of the dead, but more so as a reminder, that although you should live everyday like it’s your last, that doesn’t mean living on the edge.
THINK before you ACT, and if you’re with someone who isn’t thinking, then SPEAK before they ACT!
Despite that, whenever I hear the name K-Swift, I’ll always remember her on the radio promoting events for the “18 & Over Cru”. As far as I’m concerned, she gave high schoolers a safer place to party, and for that she had the hugest club music following to date.
Khia “K-Swift” Edgerton ( 1978-2008 )
Gone, but never forgotten.
Atlantic City
Posted by: Ily Taboada on: July 24, 2008
My TRUMP Plaza experience aside; I truly understand why people visit the city so religiously. Compared to MD’s Ocean City…. Well, honestly… There is no comparison, sorry. From my day trip and I’ll admit it was only a day trip so I can’t rave on and on about it, A.C just seemed to be better-rounded then MDOC.
No, I didn’t win any money, but the sites were nice to look at and I’d definitely return for an overnight stay (just not at the TRUMP Plaza). Casinos aside AC had a lot more to offer, bars on the beach, outlet malls, you can’t beat that!
If I learned anything on my AC trip it’s that I CANNOT tolerate bus trips. Between the CHATTERBOX that sat behind me, the drunk in the back of the bus, and the knee pains from the cramped space, I just didn’t enjoy the ride to AC.
